Following the Pebbles

To Learn the Year’s Lessons

To Learn the Year’s Lessons

Created in Canva by the author

It’s that time for a yearend review. So, I recently settled in with my cocoa, er coffee, er wine, to reflect on my year that was.

“Balanced action” was my theme for 2023.

Here are 15 of the gems I discovered and pebbles I followed along the way:

1. Ask for balance.

My sister and I took a life-altering trip to Europe this summer. One reason it was so glorious is that we honored one another’s core desires. We discussed before the trip how we often vacation differently, focusing on different things. She is an extrovert, deriving her energy from external things — adventures, and being with and around people. As an ambivert (extroverted introvert), I get my energy from bouts of solitude and quieter moments. So, we honored both and enjoyed both. And we crossed things off our bucket lists — me, the Sound of Music tour in Salzburg; her, paragliding in the Alps. In hindsight, they were crossed off both of our lists. All from asking for and honoring our mutual balance.

2. Balance-focusing infuses everything.

With balanced action, there was more leaning into what felt good. When it got to be too much (even when it was good), the balance-focusing allowed me to pause, breathe, and catch up. Then, more leaning, leaping and stepping forward, elevating.

The pause in the balanced action gives time to acclimate to the next level basecamp before continuing onward and upward.

3. Life happens in the in-between.

Balance showed me how life happens in the in-betweens, in the liminal spaces. The balance made room for the subtleties, the nuance.

Is This Where You Belong? A question to ponder in midlife

4. What’s in the ambient?

Noticing that life happens in the spaces between things also allows us to open our eyes and learn from the ambience, the atmosphere. What and who else is in the room? Taking it all in.

5. Notice the rushes of gratitude.

Better than a gold rush. The soft gratitudes that permeate and fill each day. They fill and fuel the tank. They tantalize life’s palette.

6. Always be asking.

Don’t quiet the intelligence. Heed the intelligence. During the ebb and flow, quiet the chatter and listen — ask and listen — to your higher intelligence. Is this the truth? Go deeper. Answer honestly. Higher intelligence connects with the heart knowledge. She always knows.

7. Permission is a practice.

Listen to your voice first, above all others, when it comes to knowing what’s best for you, and no one else. Permit yourself. Write your own permission slips.

8. Balanced action is alignment.

Out of balance is out of alignment; out of alignment is out of balance.

9. We hold the power of our narratives.

The stories we carry are ours. Past events can inform — do inform — but don’t own your present unless you allow it. Self-ownership is empowering. It’s the difference between self-blaming with judgment and criticism and taking responsibility for your life. And, it’s owning what’s yours and letting go of what isn’t.

10. Distraction is dis-ease.

“You’re not stuck you’re distracted.” This was a message I got loud and clear recently while in deep meditation. I asked, “Why I am stuck?” And, from my higher wisdom, this was the response: “You’re not stuck you’re distracted.” Whoa. Distractions were loud and muddled this past year, and I allowed them to stop me.

It was a huge and welcome aha. It was comforting to recognize what I thought was stuck-ness, writer’s block, whatever, was actually me stopping myself with distractions. My attention and focus were being ruled by stall tactics, distractions keeping me from the important work. I dug into exploring why. Now, I know and see the distractions for what they are and can head them off at the pass.

11. Be responsive, not reactive.

Reactive is without forethought, sometimes fight or flight. Responsive is considered, thoughtful, and balanced.

12. Embrace where you are in life.

For me, that means I’m embracing my sage chapter where I’m loving the sharing of what I’ve learned and am learning in life, and nurturing, teaching, mentoring, and lifting those around me.

13. Seek to be unassuming.

Examine assumptions about self, others, and the world. Assuming is filling in the blanks without questioning or educating yourself. Don’t assume. Un-assuming invites a balanced perspective. Then,

14. Notice and appreciate life’s teachers.

Life’s teachers can be in the most unexpected places. They are literally everywhere if you’re looking.

15. Energy production is up to me.

Inner balance leads to balanced thought and energetic output. For me, it all starts with inner balance, which starts with journaling and meditation.

So balanced action became my mantra for the year. It was a constant, steady force and thread.

A helpful mantra is like pebbles or breadcrumbs to follow on the daily path forward.